History has shown repeatedly that it is difficult to establish a democratic republic in nation with a tradition of rule by repressive regimes, monarchies, or theocracies. It's even more difficult if one of the goals of the transition is to do it bloodlessly. The United States remains very nearly the only nation to have a revolution, and consequently establish a republic, without a prolonged period of chaos, such as was experiened by France. Their revolution produced the Reign of Terror, and ultimately, the quintessential Man on Horseback in the person of Napoleon.

(As I was writing this this afternoon, my good friend Napalm with a comment reminded me of the sad attempts of Cental and South American nations to create stable lasting democracies, despite all manner of encouragement and aid we've given them)

Even in our history, it was a near thing. We were quite fortunate that a remarkable group of (states)men, children of the Enlightenment, collectively known as the Founding Fathers, were able to forge a lasting union from thirteen extremely cantankerous states. Their first attempt was flawed, and failed. Their second attempt, still imperfect, was just barely good enough. It took later revisions and a Civil War to even approach being a final product.

Many would argue that our government did not emerge from it's awkward adolescence to full responsible adulthood until after the Civil Rights movements of the sixties, well over a century after that war. This is the history of world's most successful republic.

Given the demonstrated difficulty of this process, it should not be surprising that we should attempt to study it, learn the strategies and principles that would allow us to clone it, as we face the challenges of nationbuilding in those parts of the world that still suffer under the various flavors of unfree regimes. One would expect that the academic world would be leading the charge in this effort. It seems that they are, but in a most peculiar manner.

Reuters reports that Boston University, as part of it's African Studies program, will be importing former African rulers to serve as professors, teaching the lessons learned from their experiences as heads of state.

I don't know whether to laugh or cry. I actually sat on the story before I blogged it for a few days, as I thought it might be a hoax. I could only find it in the UK national version of the Reuter's website, not in the US version, which I thought was curious as it's BU we're talking about here. After the WSJ picked up the story today on the Op-Ed page, I figured if it was good enough for them, it was good enough for me.

The first head of state they signed on for the program is Kenneth Kuanda, who ruled Zambia for 27 years under a one-party regime. Eight years into that term of office, he banned any other political parties other than his own. He left office in 1991, after mounting domestic opposition to his failed policies pressured him into allowing an election where there was actually a competing candidate, which he lost.

His loss is attributed to his policies that destroyed the Zambian agriculture, and made the national economy totally dependent on the export of copper. When copper prices fell, the economy was wrecked.

His current status as an African statesman is based primarily on his status as a victim. The followon regime was in fact even more corrupt than he was, and jailed Kuanda in 1997 for allegedly participating in a coup attempt. He was freed only after much protest by such leaders as Nelson Mandela. His recent lobbying for more aid to fight AIDS in Africa lends to this aura. The sad fact is, that as African heads of state go, he is about as good as it gets.

Kaunda will give lectures, and participate in seminars on campus, and around the country. According to a BU press release, Delta airlines has donated twelve round trip tickets to help Kuanda travel about, so that even more of us can benefit from his lessons learned. Meanwhile his papers will be cataloged and archived for further study.

Charles Stith, who runs the program at BU, is quoted as saying that he hoped Kaunda would be the first in a long line of African leaders to take part in the program. "What we're doing represents an example of the potential opportunities after the presidency. If that can serve as the impetus for some folks to move on (and leave office), then we're happy," he told Reuters.

The university evidently thinks that the prospect of spending a year in a comfortable academic sinecure might help encourage some of the despots to resign before they get tossed out of office.

I have to wonder what on earth we can hope to glean in the way of useful information from this man. Perhaps seminar topics can be titled "How to Destabilise the Economy," or perhaps, "Longevity in Office: Techniques For Circumventing Term Limits." Perhaps the theory is that we should study these leaders as examples of what not to do.

Africa seems a most unlikely place to harvest truly democratic leaders to study. Perhaps BU's next program will be to seek out and study virginity in whorehouses, economic successes in centrally controlled economies, or astrophysicists named Anna Nicole.

However, the story turns from simply stoopid to beyond bizarre. Stith, a former US ambassador to Zambia, will be looking to recruit many other former African heads of state for this program.

Per Stith, the only qualification needed is for the leader to have stepped out of office peacefully, even though the leader may have, as Kaunda did, strayed a bit to the repressive path. Even Robert Mugabe has not been ruled out. "Anybody who falls under those criteria, we're certainly willing and interested in considering," he said. "Depending on what President Mugabe decides to do, if for instance he stepped aside at a duly scheduled and legitimate election, we'd certainly look at it."

Evidently staying in power by virtue of a rigged election is not a disqualification.

How wonderful. This will allow the BU students a much greater breadth of knowledge. They could round out their studies with such lessons as "Starvation and Solidifying Support," or "Make That Tool a Political Tool; Rape as Revenge."

We have the head of a major American university stating that they would be willing to bequeath a known genocidal maniac of a dictator a salary to teach classes at that school telling us how he pulled it off.

I feel like I've been paradropped into an episode of the Twilight Zone.

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