I try soooo hard, truly I do, to keep from returning time and time again to certain topics as a dog does to his vomit, but there seem to be two issues that I simply cannot resist reporting upon, even though I've stated several times that it is not my intent to have a news-oriented blog regurgitating headlines you might have otherwise missed..

The first would be the ramshackle crap that is Microsoft software, the continuing parade of security holes that make it the most dangerous code on the planet to run for the typical enduser, (their target market, of course) and that company's predatory business practices.

The second is the (backs away from keyboard, counts to ten, repeats several times, gives up, takes a long walk, then comes back) actions and character of William Jefferson Clinton, his spouse, lackeys, and apologists.

I am by no means a simple rabid right-wing dittohead. I've very little more respect, or should I say, very little less contempt, for the Republicans than the Democrats. (See A Plague On Both Their Houses for details if you like) but I feel that Clinton will go down in history as one of the sorriest, lying, dishonest, two-faced motherfuckers of a president in the history of the US, and that's saying something.

If/when they do Dante's Inferno as a first-class, modern, Hollywood film, I hope we see old Slick Willie down at the bottom of the pit getting his ass munched on by the Devil himself, that is, if the Devil could stand the taste. I dunno who'd be being punished more in that situation.

In fact, it depresses me a bit that I don't truly believe in hell, as that means he'll escape such a fate.

The inspiration for my diatribe today is this article in the New York Times. Representative snippets follow...

"The General Accounting Office, an investigative arm of Congress, said today that "damage, theft, vandalism and pranks did occur in the White House complex" in the presidential transition from Bill Clinton to George W. Bush. The agency put the cost at $13,000 to $14,000, including $4,850 to replace computer keyboards, many with damaged or missing W keys."

What kind of high-school petty bullshit is that?

"The accounting office confirmed that $9,324 had been spent to repair or replace various items and to clean offices. That included $4,850 for 62 keyboards, $2,040 for 26 cellphones and $1,150 for professional cleaning."

This tidbit highlights not only the wonderful efficiency of our lovely federal government, but also the care with which they husband our tax dollars. Let's see, we spent $78.23 each to purchase and install keyboards?

The last time I bought some, it was at an auction, and I got eighteen of them, brand new in the box, Gateway branded surplus, for one freakin' dollar apiece. I don't even bother cleaning them. I spilled a beer on one a few months back, and just tossed the sumbitch and got another one out of the closet.

"In several instances, it appears, Clinton and Bush administration officials simply disagreed about the normal condition of federal offices. Bush officials said they had found offices full of trash, broken furniture and filthy carpets. Clinton administration officials insisted that the dirt and damage reflected normal wear and tear."

Well, what do you expext when the hillbillies are in the White House? I imagine Arkansas standards of cleanliness are a bit more lax than most of us would require. That $1150 for "professional cleaning" was most likely trying to get Buddy's dogshit stains out of the carpet, and scraping the splooge off the ceiling fans left there from the Going Out of Office Intern parties ol' Willie was having when he shoulda been paying attention to snuffing Osama.

I suggest from now on, when we get a new Commander-in-Chief, we make them put down a security deposit. I garan-dam-tee that no Little Rock landlord would be so stupid as not to.

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